The Lamest Show on Earth

A couple of weekend ago, Terri and I took our two oldest grandchildren, Madison and Clay, to Barnum and Bailey's so called Greatest Show on Earth. For the adults, it was hard to endure. The circus has really changed since my childhood. I remember the high wire and trapeze acts that were performed high over the arena floor. The acrobats and other acts were represented by highly skilled performers.

Not so much today. The curcus today is full of clowns, bikes, dogs, horses and other dime a dozen acts, all led by a ring master who sings during the entire event. The ring master and clown acts were the lamest of the lame. But that review is purely from the adult perspective.

Madison, my 5 year old grand daughter, was on the edge of her seat for the entire two hours. She was simply enchanted by the entire circus. Her joy was worth the entire price of admitting 2 adults and 2 children. Clay was a little less impressed. He paid attention until the snow cone, cotton candy and popcorn ran out. When those were finished, so was he.

The entire circus seems to be directed at draining every adult wallet in the arena. The circus started at 11:00 AM. We arrived at 10:15 ($10 to park) and HAD to get snow cones in animal shaped souvenir mugs. That was $10 for Clay's elephant mug, and $12 for Madison's horse head mug. The cotton candy vendor walked by around 10:25. Cotton candy was the highlight for Clay last year, so could not be ignored this year. Cost was another $8.

About 5 minutes later, a vendor with lighted spinning toys walked by and saw my grand kids snap to attention. Without even asking, he handed each a toy that was bright, shining and fun. We had bought similar toys for them last year, so there was no easy way to back out of the situation. Cost was another $36. Mercifully, the circus began a few minutes later and eased the cash flow problem I was experiencing.

During intermission, the popcorn vendor walked by. That cost another $12. So far, the circus was into me by $88 plus the cost of the tickets. We managed to endure the rest of the show without further cost. I knew it was going to be expensive and was prepared to meet my grand children's expectations, so nothing was a surprise to me. I have concluded that today's Lamest Show on Earth is targeted at children with well funded escorts.