My Best Golf Story

The men's 9-hole league that I have participated in for the last 10 years began again this week. Being out on the course reminded me of one of the funniest events I have ever witnessed in the game. Several years ago, my partner and I were grouped with a couple of guys who were new to the league. One looked like he had played before. The other did not. We knew from the tee sheets the second guy had a 9 hole average of 80. He was a very new golfer.

As we worked our way through the 9 holes, the 80's golfer was having his fair share of problems, but not as much as would be expected when considering his average. On the 9th tee, I asked him if he was having a pretty decent round. He replied that he was. In fact, if he shot under 14 on the final hole he would beat his personal best of 64 on 9 holes. I encouraged him that he should be able to come in under 14 if he just hit 9-irons through the entire par-5.

We teed off. The 80's golfer hit his drive fairly long, but to the left and the ball bounced into a small wooded area. Beating 14 was still not a problem. He could simply take a penalty stroke and hit his third from the area beside the woods. The rest of the foursome hit into the fairway or off to the right. I remember looking over to the left and seeing the 80's golfer flailing away in the woods. I assumed he was looking for his ball.

Finally, we all made it to the final green. After everyone had putted in, I turned to the 80's golfer, quite sure he had beat 14 on the hole, and asked him if he had a new personal best. "No" he replied. "It took me 9 shots to get out of the woods." Apparently, in his rush to become a golfer, he never boned up on the rules of the game. He probably had seen pro-golfers hitting their ball out of heavy rough and assumed that you play every shoot from where it lie.

The group informed him of his option to take a penalty stroke instead of bang away in the brush. He thanked us but seemed a little embarrassed that he did not know the rules of the game. I have not seen him in the league since. One thing I can say for him is that he was an honest golfer.